Sci-Fi Channel original movie at it’s finest; except this is not a Sci-Fo Channel movie but one that somehow managed to be released in theatres nationwide. The Mist is poorly written and poorly acted (but does have surprisingly good effects). The movie is not thrilling, it is stupid. It is not suspenseful, it is clichéd.

Prime shows that a relationship with an age gap will not work. Even when there is a connection on every human level (physical, emotional, mental), when his parents accept her age, you will fight about something vague and unexplained. The relationship will end. A year later you will see her, smile and walk away. Why? Because the screenwriter is a dick.

Crystal Skull fails to engage. The characters are never in any real peril and the quest doesn’t deliver mysteries and surprises. Thankfully the film steers away from in-jokes and self-references, aside from a few touches at the start. As a straight action/adventure flick, Crystal Skull is pretty decent but as a part of the larger Indiana Jones canon, it’s subpar.

It’s like a Harry Potter villains reunion. Bellatrix, Snape and Wormtail. Also? Decent singing. Also? Bloody. Really, very bloody.

Sometimes I can tell if I’m going to love a movie from just the first few minutes. Stranger Than Fiction is one of those movies. The impeccable onscreen graphics and music got me. Will Ferrell turns in a performance that proves he can do more than slapstick comedy. An unconventional way to tell a love story. Perfect.

As a child of the 80s, I approached Michael Bay’s Transformers with more than a little hesitation. Surprisingly, the movie was better than I expected. I have gripes that only another fanboy could understand (character design, story elements) but this movie is leaps and bounds better than the director’s last effort. Incredibly, the humor was smart and it entertained.

Awful movie. One of those “it’s Saturday and there’s nothing on” films. This is a classic rivalry story—the Chicago mob and Kentucky hillbillies. Starring a surprising number of well-known actors (Helen Hunt, Patrick Swayze, Liam Neeson, Ben Stiller (!)). Almost redeemed by the big fight scene featuring axes, bows and arrows, snakes and semi-automatic firearms.

The typical Conspiracy/Action movie—An individual becomes the target of a shadowy, powerful organization. He must fight against all odds (and waves of bad guys) to clear his name. Shooter never quite rises above the sum of it’s parts. There is no risk, no thrill; Wahlberg’s Bob Lee Swagger is a super-soldier and we know he will win.

A football movie for people who don’t like football. Not a true biopic; Invincible seemed a little light on some details (Papale’s wife and football career, for instance) and the story was laid out without much in the way of surprising turns, it was entertaining nonetheless. I even found myself getting anxious during the “big game” at the story’s climax.

Based on the real life events, Breach gives a look at what may have happened behind-the-scenes of the “greatest security breach in US history.” I expected thrilling chase scenes and other spy movie mandatories. This film skips past the cliches and offers the director’s take on the motivations of Robert Hanssen.